Warning Signs of Perpetrators
There are literally all types of perpetrators. Some are loudly aggressive, while others are quite passive in public. Some are gregarious, while others are loners. Many are attractive and popular, model students from model families. Here are some behaviors that are common:
Alcohol or drug use - Some perpetrators rely on alcohol or drugs to release them from their normal inhibitions or to give them the “courage” to become more aggressive toward their victim.
Possessive or jealous behavior toward partner - Whether in public or private, possessiveness and jealous accusations often precede and follow violence. The abuser will often attempt to socially isolate their partner by forbidding them to see or talk to others or by making frequent accusations of infidelity, which forces the victim to limit their social life in order to appease them.
Harassment or threats - Failure to accept the breakup of a relationship is a common indicator of physical abuse. Often victims are abused or threatened when they try to break off the relationship.
Suicide attempts or threats of suicide over a relationship - Suicidal gestures or threats can be intended to manipulate the victim into remaining in the relationship. In some cases they can be accompanied by physical abuse or threats of homicide.
Marked changes in mood or personality - Extreme agitation, depression, social withdrawal, or aggressiveness can be tip-offs to relational conflict or violence.
Fights with others about partner - This can indicate a pattern of jealous accusations or possessive control toward the victim. They may be constantly monitoring their interactions with others, even after they have broken up.
(from Arizona Coalition for Domestic Violence)
If any of these behaviors seem familiar and you think you may be in an abusive relationship, see the link to Victims/Survivors.
If you have a friend that you believe is in a potentially dangerous relationship, see Friends of Victims/Survivors for information on how to help.
